Are You Over-Doing It With Your Kids?
Parenting Perspectives Blog
by LAUREN Bondy
4y ago
By Karen Jacobson, MA, LCPC, LMFT There is a lot of talk that today’s parents are: Over-involved in their children’s lives Over-indulging and buying too much Over-scheduling children with too many activities Over-pressuring kids, wanting them to succeed and be superstars Over-praising children in hopes that they will have good self-esteem Over-stimulating kids with computers, videos, electronic games, and cell phones Over-focusing on our children’s happiness New evidence suggests that in our efforts to give children the best, we end up over-doing it and unknowingly creating some negative cons ..read more
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Setting Limits:  Helping Children Develop Healthy Boundaries
Parenting Perspectives Blog
by LAUREN Bondy
4y ago
By Lauren Bondy, LCSW Many of the most common family struggles can be solved with effective limit setting; yet, this critical skill is one that many parents lack.  Some parents find themselves giving in against their better judgment.  Others don’t set limits to avoid conflict.  Some want to be the fun friend rather than the bad guy.  If you face daily frustrations, power struggles, tantrums, or feelings of doubt and insecurity about your parenting, this article will help.     Limits are essential for children’s healthy emotional development.  Limits convey to children that their parents care a ..read more
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I'm Bored
Parenting Perspectives Blog
by LAUREN Bondy
4y ago
Children spend much of their time either being entertained or in scheduled activities.  Structured activities such as day care, school, camp, classes, sports and other activities involve adults providing the format and directions.  Increasingly, downtime involves electronics and screen time where children are plugged in being entertained and stimulated by something other than their own imagination.  Children today have fewer opportunities to sit in solitude, to daydream, to use their imagination and simply be.  Many parents complain that when their children are faced with unstructured time t ..read more
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Do You Dread Mornings?
Parenting Perspectives Blog
by Fallon Parfaite
4y ago
Has the start of school meant the return of morning madness and power struggles? No one wants to start the day with arguments, yelling and threatening as you try to get the kids out the door on time. You can put an end to the morning battles with these simple steps:  Decide what time you need to leave the house in order to arrive at school without rushing. List all the tasks that need to be done prior to leaving. Simplify the list – what can be done the night before? what can be done before waking the kids? Decide upon a routine/ morning schedule that makes sense. Decide if any new rules would ..read more
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Need Bubble Wrap?
Parenting Perspectives Blog
by Fallon Parfaite
4y ago
By Karen Jacobson, MA, LCPC, LMFT It is hard to watch your child fall, get hurt, struggle and make mistakes.  It is hard to see them feel sad, scared or not good enough. A parent I work with recently said, “I need more bubble wrap.” She wanted to protect her kids by wrapping them in bubble wrap so they would not bruise or break.  The wish was for bubble wrap to provide safe passage through the journey of childhood, adolescence and beyond. Today, many well-meaning parents are layering the bubble wrap in many areas of their children’s lives. They are hovering, doing things for children that they ..read more
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Beyond Manners: Teaching Children Respect
Parenting Perspectives Blog
by Fallon Parfaite
4y ago
Back talk, lack of manners, foul language, name calling, rude behavior, and children making demands of parents seems to be more commonplace in today’s world. Disrespect is modeled everywhere: TV, movies, You-Tube videos, music lyrics, at sporting events, and even in the pick-up lines of pre-school. Teaching children respect and manners is essential; learning to live and behave respectfully translates into self–respect which is the building block of self-esteem. Being respectful generally means having manners, being kind and compassionate, and handling emotions and challenges in a non-hurtful ..read more
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Decoding the Language of Your Child’s Behavior
Parenting Perspectives Blog
by Fallon Parfaite
4y ago
By Karen Jacobson, MA, LCPC, LMFT Kids don’t wake up and say, “Mom and Dad, I am hurting.  Adjusting to a new school year is hard.  There are so many changes.  I have a new teacher, different kids in my class, harder work.  I am worried.  It is overwhelming.”  Instead they refuse to get dressed, get into power struggles over food or homework, have toilet accidents, forget their lunch, hit their siblings, have stomach aches or tantrums, or want to sleep with mom or dad.   Children communicate through their behavior.  As parents, we need to decode the messages our children are sending us. Whethe ..read more
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Have Intention: Parenting Choices Have Consequences
Parenting Perspectives Blog
by Fallon Parfaite
4y ago
By Lauren Bondy, LCSW Being a conscious parent means having intention about the qualities we wish to nurture in our children and for the type of parent we want to be. Intention is essential–especially in our toughest parenting moments. Developing a family vision can be supported by making three very specific lists: List #1: Write down the qualities you hope to nurture in your child. Be specific. Think ahead to the time when he is old enough to leave your care. Ask yourself, how do you hope he will feel about himself? The world? What do you wish for his character to be? Often, parents think abo ..read more
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Helping Children Grieve Divorce
Parenting Perspectives Blog
by Fallon Parfaite
4y ago
By Karen Jacobson, MA, LCPS, LCPC Helping Children Grieve Divorce As a therapist I have worked with hundreds of children experiencing divorce.  As a parent, I have experienced divorce and helped my own children cope and move through this unwanted change in their family.  Even when you think you know what you should do, it is SO hard and SO complicated.  Divorce is an emotional process.  Everyone in the family has intense feelings; each person is expressing and managing them in their own way.  Each divorce has its unique path.  My work has taught me that children often believe they need to hide ..read more
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Key Elements to Preventing Sibling Rivalry
Parenting Perspectives Blog
by Fallon Parfaite
4y ago
All siblings will fight from time to time, but parents can consciously choose to behave in ways that reduce competition and negative feelings among siblings. Two key strategies to reduce friction and rivalry among siblings are acknowledging and empathizing when children express negative feelings towards their sibling(s) and avoiding praising one child in front of another. Having brothers and/or sisters is wonderful, but at times it can be frustrating, annoying, and maddening. Children always have a mixture of both positive and negative feelings about their sibling(s). Their feelings are normal ..read more
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