There was a new face at Anita’s Airtime Emporium. I didn’t know what an emporium was, but I had long gotten used to the fact that Anita, even though she can’t pronounce them all, had more words than I did. My main concern was the new girl, who she was, why, and what. Secondary concerns included why her weave looked like a dried out maize plantation, why her lipstick had been applied with a thumb and why her eyebrows were upside down and in two pairs. I immediately asked the first question. I am a well trained journalist. We ask questions. Here is how the interview went. 1.Who is that? A (For a ..read more

  Since the last time we saw Anita Everything, the local airtime vendor, a few things have changed. You know when they tell you to empower and educate the girl child, you make the fatal mistake of assuming that this is done so she can be a more efficient secretary. Well, the joke’s on you, backward societal values entrenching oppression, because when Anita got empowered with the tool of basic literacy she went to the internet, read Art Of War, and came back with so much ruthless business kung fu that by the time she was done, all the other airtime stalls were out of business. It was only her ..read more

On 24th June, this year we visited the Naguru Remand Home for juveniles. In a bid to spread the love of reading (through our publications, book clubs and libraries), we went to the Remand Home to see what contribution we could make to the children in their custody.  The formal definition of a remand home is a common law institution to which juvenile offenders may be committed by the court for temporary detention. If a child offender is not released on bail, the remand home takes them in for safe custody, good care and to ensure that the child is taken to court when required.  In Uganda, there ..read more

  Previously on Anita Everything. Anita kicked my ex out in my house. Well she wasn’t my ex until after the kicks but there was leg violence instigated by Anita and the outcome was, naturally, a dumping, which was to be mine. So I was not too happy to see Anita this morning. Problem is she has taken monopoly over the airtime sales in the hood so there was no where else to go to load up. Me: Anita give me one K airtime. Her: Anko nawe, are you annoyed at me? Is dat why you are buying half da usual amount? Are you passive agglessing me? Me: Maybe it’s because now that I am single, thanks to you ..read more

Previously on Anita Everything: Anita decided to hook up with Big Ssu from flat number four on my block. Because Big Ssu doesn’t care about dental health he bought condoms but not toothpaste, which lead to Anita knocking on my door in the morning looking for colgate. Problem is that she was not just in the morning, she was also in just a towel. And now she is also in my bathroom brushing in my sink. And that is when my special lady friend shows up. Let me introduce Nakiwanuka who passed through Compton once while she was studying in California and is now known as Naquanusha. Naquanusha: (To t ..read more

Previously on Anita Everything, a fat thick huge obnoxious Prado comes to a screeching halt at the edge of Anita’s airtime stall. Which is now also a coffee kiosk. Big Ssu is my landlord. I would call him a friend except for two things. First of all, he’s not the sort of person you want to be associated with in public. He is very very corrupt. He is possibly the most corrupt Ugandan not working for government. This guy has a fully valid driver’s license, but he would rather bribe the police than spend the energy looking for it in his agbada. Yeah. he wears oversized agbadas all the time. That ..read more

Now, this is how the suburb of Bulabira was laid out, for those of you who are unfamiliar with how every single Kampala suburb is laid out. We have the trading centre here. It is a string of shops each selling the same stuff. Stale cakes, sachet liquor, mosquito coils, soda, katunda lager and groudnuts. Then we have the boda stage. We also have the airtime stall. Then the rolex guys, roughly eight of them. Two smell more than the food they cook and yet they still come back every evening wondering why no one buys their rollas and blaming the government for destroying the economy. Beyond the tr ..read more

Harriet Anena is no doubt, currently one of the most talented poets in Africa. The various accolades under her belt, the most recent being the Wole Soyinka Prize for Literature in Africa, are evidence of this. What truly makes her stand out though is her grit and resilience. She is a hard worker. Plain and simple. And she understands truly what it means not to give up. Anena has been accepted to Columbia University, for an MFA in Creative Writing and is currently fundraising for the course that starts in August 2019 with a GoFundMe page and a poetry and music experience on the 28th, 29th and 3 ..read more

I remember the first time I ever laid eyes on Anita. She was wearing an apron with the logo and in the colours of one telecom company while selling the airtime of another company. She struggled to stay seated on a small stool which every observer could instantly see, was too small for all that hip she had. I took one look at her and thought to myself, “Hot Shibbidy, this girl faaaayayaain!” . And then I took one smell at her and thought, “Eh! Which village is this one from?” Those of us with economic privilege and Facebook accounts all know that villagers smell very rural. They smell of a mix ..read more

The village of Ggwa was in turmoil. All across the dusty, dung-strewn pathways and all across the seething sewer streams, the men were in a high level of perplexation, which spell check has just informed me is not a real word. But what does it want me to do? How else can I describe the state of being both perplexed and vexed? The men were in a crim cram and kabomboliggo at the news I relayed in the last post, i.e, that Anita, the village belle, was leaving Ggwa to go and seek her fortunes in the city of Kampala. “How can she go when none of us has married her?” each of them whined. “Yes, how ..read more