In a previous blog post, I discussed the barriers towards acceptance. These barriers all play off of unhelpful perceptions and ideas that prevent one from fully embracing the idea of acceptance.   But why is it even important to really work towards acceptance? Well, when we are unable to accept the things in our life that are outside of our control (i.e. our authentic emotional experience or the unhelpful thoughts that pop into our minds), we are unable to live mindfully and meaningfully in the present moment. This serves only to reinforce an unconstructive struggle with our intrin ..read more

Heart pounding. Light headed. Lungs starving for air. Shaking. Sweating. About to throw up. On the verge of passing out. Chest pains. Hands are tingling. Feet are numb. Sure you’re about to drop dead at any moment, yet unsure if what is happening is even real…   Panic attacks. Perhaps the closest one can come to death without actually dying. At least, that’s how it feels in the moment. These intense experiences of anxiety are ruthless, typically peaking around 10 minutes and then slowly dissipating. They can’t kill you; they just feel like they can. However, no matter how many times you’v ..read more

­Anger is a natural and normal feeling or emotion that everyone is capable of feeling. Anger is a natural, adaptive response to perceived threats and it can inspire powerful feelings and behaviours that allow us to defend ourselves. A certain amount of anger can be appropriate and feelings of anger are common and healthy.   Anger can be seen as a warning sign; Our mind and body are telling us that something is wrong and we must deal with it in a healthy way. Ignoring the warning signs can result in expressing anger in unhealthy ways. If we do not deal with feelings of anger as they occur ..read more

Premarital counselling has been incorporated into my practice to help couples be proactive and help prevent the deep hurt and suffering that I have witnessed resulting from affairs and divorce. Couples who have engaged in this process have benefited greatly.  Sentiments that they express include: “I think everyone should do this before getting married. It has improved our communication and given us great tools to work through difficult and touchy subjects.” What is Marriage Preparation?  Understand the strengths and challenges in your relationship and how to work through the differe ..read more

Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a mental health condition characterized by obsessions and compulsions that interfere with daily life. Obsessions can take the form of repeated thoughts, feelings, images, or sensations, whereas compulsions refer to ritualistic behaviours or mental acts (e.g., worrying, ruminating, thought replacement, counting or repeating words or phrases until it feels “right,”) that a person with OCD will feel driven to carry out in response to an obsession. Typically, a person with OCD learns to carry out compulsions as a means to temporarily eliminate or reduce the i ..read more

Have you ever been happily going about your day and had your partner come and share that they are upset with you; often our mind goes to “they have no reason to feel that way”, and what was them sharing their feelings now become both of you mad at each other over who knows what. This is a common experience and one that highlights how important understanding our partners experience is.    Let’s take a step back and examine what is going on when we don’t look to understand when our partner raises a concern. In this situation, our partner is trying to explain why they were hurt or annoy ..read more

Life can feel so busy and overwhelming at times. We live in a society that sometimes celebrates overworking which can lead to an imbalance of work-home life, limited self-care, and burnout. Due to this view on taking a break, we can feel guilty taking a break which pushes up to work harder and ignore the signs our body and mind are telling us that we need a break.    Its important to understand the importance of taking a break and commit to prioritizing breaks in your life. Below are a few strategies that may help you take a break and remove the guilt.    Add it to your li ..read more

Self worth is a term so commonly used and is often interchangeable with self esteem, self love, self acceptance. All of these common terms really relate to one’s ability to feel valued and worth love from oneself and others.    One of the best ways to work on self worth is to acknowledge and be aware of your inner self critic. What are the thoughts that often appear when self reflecting or self evaluating? Thoughts can be so powerful! Most of us have patterns of thinking that often influence how we feel and often our behavior as well. Our feelings are always valid but an important to ..read more

Intimacy From the Inside Out (IFIO) is a new and powerful model for couple’s therapy. This approach was developed by Toni Herbine-Blank, senior trainer for the Center for Self-Leadership. The methodology is based on the Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy developed by Richard Schwartz in the 1980’s. IFIO incorporates aspects of psychodynamic theory, systems thinking and neuroscience to create a relationship where both partners can feel loved and understood.   So much in our world is uncertain and as social beings we want to know that the people we choose to have in our inner circle are ..read more

  Have you ever found yourself having an internal debate- where one part of you felt one way and another part felt another way? Have you experienced times when you feel like a passenger in your life, and you can’t believe how you are behaving? Maybe you have a part that yells and behaves outwardly angry. Or maybe you have a part that shuts down and withdraws and is unable to speak. Sometimes we have parts that turn to substances to cope or self sabotage when we try to change. We all experience times when we feel like “parts” of ourselves have taken over and feel like we have no control ov ..read more