It’s almost the end of March, and I have been messaging the clinic for a week to find out what date our 12 week scan will be . I haven’t had much luck in getting a date and have been told that ,perhaps today the doctor will say what the date is. She apparently already has a date set, but for some reason, the account managers haven’t managed to retrieve this information. Work is busy, and I really want to try and make the trip over for the 12 week scan. But with only a few weeks to go, it’s looking unlikely that I will be able to. So now, hubbie and I need to look at ways to transfer money over ..read more

Yesterday was a special day, in the UK we celebrated Mothers Day. It’s a day for people to celebrate their mothers, and for mums to feel special and pampered. For a lot of people who are going through fertility struggles, this day is difficult. For me? Surprisingly, I’ve always taken it in my stride. Every year, I go and celebrate with my mother, and also make a big deal of it for every other mum in the family. Yesterday, I decided that I deserve to give myself a break and spend the weekend with my husband, just the 2 of us. We didn’t do anything overly special, we went outside and spent the d ..read more

I woke up yesterday morning with butterflies! It was the day that we were waiting for, the clinic would be doing an ultrasound scan on our surrogate to check the embryos. I messaged a manager at the clinic as soon as I woke up to remind her to send the report as soon as they could, as we were very nervous. I then got to work by 7am, so I could find something to keep me busy. Stacking cakes at 7am certainly does that The day got very busy with work in my kitchen, but I felt I was peeking at my phone a lot during the day. It got to 2.30 which is 4.30pm Kiev time, and I didn’t know if the clinic ..read more

It’s Tuesday morning, the day before we should be getting some news from the clinic, and my nerves are shot! It’s been a long 2 weeks of waiting, and I am grateful that I have had work to keep me busy. This morning is another busy morning for me as I have a wedding cake to deliver at the end of the week, so work is keeping me busy and getting me through my long wait. But the thought that tomorrow is the day we find out if our surrogate continues to have a healthy pregnancy is still on my mind. At 4 weeks, it’s difficult to see much. From what I have read in the internet, it’s usually very diff ..read more

For anyone thinking about surrogacy, the internet seems like an obvious starting point to do some research. After all, there is a vast array of information, and nowadays, everyone is connected. But can you trust what you read, and is it misleading? Looking back on our journey, I did the same thing. I firstly started by researching surrogacy, and found that due to the agencies within the UK being full and closing their books to intended parents (Summer 2016), we would have to look overseas. I narrowed my search to Ukraine, and then went about researching the top clinics. To do this, I started b ..read more

It’s the halfway point in my second 2WW, and time is passing so slowly it seems. This week is becoming a bit of a blur as work is keeping me busy, and I’m thankful for that. But something’s are always there at the back of my mind. Mainly, the thought of our surrogate mother. It’s the same old thoughts, is she looking after herself? Is she having any symptoms? What if she’s started bleeding but the clinic decide not to say anything until the 2 weeks is up and it’s the day of the scan? These thoughts can drive you crazy. I can’t really do anything except wait! Since last week, and the news of th ..read more

I woke up this morning and it felt a little strange. Firstly, I had a bit of a sore head from one too many happy celebration drinks last night … but also, I feel in some way, we have now entered a second 2WW. This time it’s for the scan to see if the pregnancy is progressing. It’s a very strange feeling, to be so apprehensive and guarded from happiness. I am happy, because this is the first time we have managed to get any sort of positive result! But I also have to calm myself and take a step back, because it it such early days. We don’t know what the scan will show in 2 weeks, so we need to ..read more

I had an email  from one of the English managers a while ago. It read “Congratulations, your surrogate is pregnant.” I froze and held my breath for about a minute before I did anything, I think I was in shock! I didn’t know if I should disturb my husband at work or to wait until he gets home, we were both expecting bad news. But I decided to ring him. I don’t want him to get too excited, but he deserves to have a happy afternoon!   I just blurted it out “The clinic emailed me and said the test is positive”. It went very quiet, I had to check that we were not disconnected. He was just ..read more

The sweet pain of the dreaded 2ww has reached a crescendo yesterday, when I inadvertently shouted at my next door neighbor…. but I’m getting ahead of myself! Lets start at the beginning. It’s been a long 2 weeks. The embryo transfer to our surrogate took place on February 15th, and since then I have been trying to keep busy. I’ve started on Project Me which involves going to the gym, and generally giving myself time to do some of the things I love to do. I’ve been eating better, pampering myself and making sure I give myself time to relax. Ive also spent a lot of time with family, especially t ..read more

I’ve written in a previous post about the relief of knowing I can stop treatment, due to the toll it has take on my body and my mind. It’s been 2 long years, of hormone treatments, steroids, surgeries and disappointment. When the doctor decided that I won’t be allowed to go through stimulation again after the previous egg retrieval surgery (my heart rate went very low during surgery)  I felt an immediate sense of relief. Growing up, I always struggled with my weight and body image. Being a “heavy” teenager, I was never comfortable in my body, and this carried into my early 20s. I eventual ..read more