HOW TO TRANSFORM “PEOPLE PLEASING, PERFECTIONISM AND SELF SABOTAGE”, SIMPLY AND FAST. “Where did he disappear?” Tereza started looking for her date, when she didn’t see him at the dance floor. He promised to make this a nice evening, since he screwed up last time. “Oh, there he is, around the corner”. She couldn’t believe her eyes. He was kissing another women! Tereza felt so humiliated and angry. She wanted to yell at him and slap his face. But instead, she froze. Her mind went blank and words escaped her. She was scared to show her anger and burn the bridges, so she quietly ..read more

Angelica wanted to find a boyfriend who she could proudly call “hers” and introduce him at the party of her friends. However, he didn’t show up in her life yet. She complained: “I am again the only single woman at a party, this sucks!”  What is Angelica doing wrong and how can you avoid that? FIVE POPULAR “DEAD END TRAILS” AND REASONS WHY WOMEN FALL FOR THEM Angelica and many other women describe their search for their future partner something like this: I am open for a new relationship. I haven’t thought of it in detail, but I have an idea what I want. I haven’t met ..read more

Ariane was hopeless and fed up: “I have looked everywhere, they simply don’t exist anymore. I doubt that investing more time into dating makes sense. I am better of single…” She complained that real men were extinct. According to her today’s men only want easy women who throw themselves at the guys. She had several examples from her surrounding. She concluded ALL men were lazy, incapable and prefer to settle for a woman which they have to invest the least effort in. Richard, who was also present at the discussion, became agitated and gave Ariane piece of his mind:&nbs ..read more

Maribel was exhausted and depressed by her unsuccessful search for a man. She posted her question to the women’s forum: “What is wrong with my profile, since nobody has showed any interest in six months? Below is her profile. I am just a normal girl… I am 43, divorced.  I don’t have any children. I am mid height, ok looking. I like reading, cooking and I have a cat. I have an office job. I am a sociable person. I have been disappointed in life but I am ready to start over. I am looking for that special someone to brighten my days and enjoy the life together. &nbs ..read more

They were all around me. Happy couples, holding hands in the line for ice-cream, laughing. And then, there was me. A divorced, thirty plus year old woman, already two years without a man. Sleeping alone night after night. I missed having what they had. A friend of mine shared how she recently met her love online, after ten years of being single.             I started to wonder: “Should I do something about my situation?”   A few months later I felt ready. I decided I wanted to have a husband and a family and that I was goin ..read more

Sam was looking at me confidently across the table on our first date and nonchalantly complimented on my figure. He started to draw a picture of an adventure I could experience with him. It included slightly illegal things that are only allowed in Amsterdam. He presented himself as a successful fun guy, who had a lot of women interested in him. However he only spends time with high quality people “like me” because he has no time to waste. “Wow, how impressive, I am already feeling special, right?”  He was clearly a player. While he was putting up his show ..read more

After his divorce Jan felt lonely and wanted to find a new partner. However he doubted he was able to do it: “I don’t like to present myself and compete with others at the dating market. Which woman would possibly like my bald head?” His neighbour Susan was also single and insecure: “I am too skinny and not pretty enough for men to like me. I am not interesting enough to stand out of the crowd.”  They secretly liked each other but… When they accidentally met on the street, both quickly looked down and quietly passed one another. Every night they were sleeping alone at the opposite s ..read more

It has been already two years after the heartbreaking experience, but Jane is still scared to give dating another try. With a trembling voice she said: “I am scared I will not be able to stand up for myself and will get hurt again.”   Jane has a good reason for her concern because she are unknowingly caring a dating saboteur with her. Dating saboteur is forcing her to behave according to three rules: “I don’t deserve” “I am not good enough” “Others come before me” The effect of the dating saboteur is tricky. It causes that people are unkind to their own feelings, they accept ..read more

Linda was excited: ”I think I finally found the one, his name is Tomas!” Tomas could have been an ideal boyfriend, handsome and fun. He always dreamed of a beautiful wife, somebody like Linda. However, something inside him was scared he would lose his freedom and his life would become boring. All these years he tried so hard to find her and yet he did not allow any of the women to become the “one”. Unfortunately… Linda was no exception. She was devastated: “I don’t get it, did I do something wrong?” Years later, when Tomas realised what he was doing, he cove ..read more

Jane has a good reason for her concern because she are unknowingly caring a “I am scared I will not be able to stand up for myself and will get hurt again.”   with her. Dating sabotager is forcing her to behave according to three rules ..read more