Topical jokes as Boris Johnson and pals get in trouble for caning cheese and wine during a lockdown Xmas party.  All we need now is news that the Downing Street refurbishment was done to make room for illegal partying. It looks like the Boris loyalists will pass his latest legislation aka Her Majesty’s Opposition. Instead of being angry at people going to an illegal cheese and wine, we should be angry that cheese and wines were ever illegal. I suppose I would cry if I was humiliated on national TV for not going to an illegal cheese and wine . 2023: Boris and co re-enact the last bit of Bu ..read more

Topical jokes as Boris Johnson blathers about kids TV to an audience of financiers, COP26 cops out and we are still scared of a pandemic that we are inoculated against.  COP26 disaster. Suddenly Insulate Britain glueing themselves to roads seems quite a moderate act. Planet’s fucked, billionaires all designing rockets and nobody seems able to join these two big fat dots. The iSage Save Xmas plan involves everyone being frogmarched by gunpoint for boosters on Xmas Eve. We created a police state to fight a disease which the vast majority won’t get sick from , and we deal with an extinction ..read more

Topical jokes as France are enraged by Australia’s new defence plans, Boris wants to bring back imperial measures, Gavin Williamson cannot tell black people apart and Keir Starmer keeps on being terrible.  So which crap team will big Sam Allardicci try to save this season? My bet is Barcelona. Piers Morgan is BACK. By which I mean on a channel designed to generate 15 second videos for Twitter run by an information trafficking mob boss. I know what will make China reduce carbon emissions. Make them believe that an impending nuclear war means climate change is the least of their problems ..read more

Topical satire including GB News jokes, Jeff Bezos jokes and more, including England’s Euro final defeat against Italy.  Today GB News main story is about the chaos at recently opened news channel GB News. Facebook are killing people by allowing misinformation on their platform which may impact decision of people to vaccinate against 99% survival rate virus. Meanwhile, Joe Biden sells missiles to pretty much anyone. Everyone has left GB News and poor wee Darren Grimes still cannot get a job. Funny to think that if Boris Johnson was not PM, he almost certainly would be on GB News defendin ..read more

Topical jokes as Matt Hancock is caught on camera with his lover, there are by elections galore and some tomato puree causes a major traffic incident.  Bezos will be on space flight. Maybe when Bezos is in orbit, we can quickly move Earth ? If only white people put as much effort into avoiding being racist as they do into avoiding kneeling. Steve Clarke’s pre match teamtalk will mainly be to go through which pre match racism routine they are doing. So Scotland are standing up against racism v Czechs. Kneeling against England.. Dunno about Croatia, maybe the Highland fling ? Irony of Engl ..read more

Topical jokes as Labour lose the Hartlepool by election, Dominic Cummings slates Boris and Israel drops a load of bombs.  Israel’s actions are a bit like if France started bombing Paris suburbs in retaliation for Bataclan. Media buildings bombed. Israel actually trying to blow up the evidence that they are blowing things up. So the Tories demonetised Britain while self monetising the crisis. And got a 15 point poll lead out of it. That is some evil genius shit. Labour to go through long, painful leadership election to replace pedestrian establishment poodle with a pedestrian establishmen ..read more

Topical jokes as Keir Starmer flounders in the polls , lockdown goes on and GB News promises to be another news channel that will more like resemble One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.  The system, endlessly asking us about our well being while locking us up at home. Sending Prince Eddie to Scotland won’t save the Union. Sending him to Isis controlled Syria might. Handforth Parish Council’s Zoom re-enactment of the last Labour Party conference is excellent. Keith Starmer didn’t advance the class struggle but he sure will ensure most classes keep struggling. Cannot wait to see arch metro eli ..read more

Topical jokes as GB News prepares to launch, Gareth Bales prepares to sit on the bench and Brexit is going wrong again.  GB News. This controversial channel run by hardcore Tories worries me. Anyway, that’s enough about the BBC. In a country that just voted for a mad economic experiment favoured by hard right millionaires, Rupert Murdoch responds by deciding the UK needs a right wing news channel. Don’t waste Covid vaccinations. I am sure they could flavour banana bread or something. The biggest spreader of conspiracy theories are MSM disinformation units., Brexit: from £350m to the NHS ..read more

Topical jokes as Millwall refuse to get on their knee, Brexit is finally done and everybody is confused by Xmas lockdown rules.  Just lock Boris and the EU tecnocrat in a bloody lift. They’ll spend half an hour snarking before ending up realising they are actually both power crazed numnuts with no real friends. Bankers don’t start wars, progressives do. Why don’t the Navy just do the fishing too? Just shoot at the fish, bollocks to all these nets and shit. The only thing Australian about this Brexit is that our economy is going to be about as appealing as the outback. I am not sure the t ..read more

Topical jokes as the Tories mess up A Levels, Rule Britannia isn’t banned from anything, Ben and Jerry’s stick up for migrants and Keir Starmer still isn’t twenty points clear.  Not saying Keith Starmer is getting too cosy with the Gory Party but him and Bozza will be redoing that Dancin in the Street video soon. The education algo will be the Prime Minister in 20 year. I get it now. Lockdown wasn’t about stopping physical movement but social class movement. The gory comedy in watching a former warmonger criticise an Establishment poodle over the actions of an old Etonian. Democracy, 2020 ..read more