I’m convinced there are Black Holes in Care Homes.   There is no other explanation for where some of Maureen’s gear goes whenever she is in Respite Care.   Relentless searches by care staff at Ashgrove have so far failed to unearth her a pair of tights, trousers, and slippers.  If she realises that her slippers are missing we are in real trouble as they are special to her as her sister bought them for her.   The Black Hole in Ashgrove must suck in slippers as a pair went missing on a previous visit.  Perhaps we have got off lightly this t ..read more

After a two weeks respite break, it’s taking me a while to get up to speed as Maureen’s Care Partner.  I was struggling last night when Maureen thought a woman was going to ‘steal her food and cause her harm.’  She also said that this woman had ‘taken her baby away.’  It took me a long time trying to reassure her that I would keep her safe and ease her into sleep on the sofa. One good piece of news is that Maureen’s eye infection is clearing up.  The antibiotic cream prescribed over the phone by a Practice Nurse seems to be doing the trick.  Perhaps such min ..read more

There may have been times in our lives when we might have welcomed a loved one saying they couldn’t live without us.  Maureen’s cry of helplessness when she woke up this morning had quite the opposite effect: it brought tears to my eyes. As I helped her to find her way to the bathroom I reassured her that it was only a matter of time until she regained her confidence and became her old self again. There were some good moments yesterday.  None better than returning from shopping and hearing Maureen and Our Little Gem singing this one: The girls were in hysterics when I picked up a sw ..read more

Maureen came into her own very early this morning after spending most of yesterday catching up on sleep.  She loved looking at some old family photographs that her sister had sent us several years ago.  The one above is my favourite of the big sister of the family with her siblings. I often think I have turned into a One Trick Pony relying on music to fill our day.  I’m hoping that sifting through these photographs, and many others that are tucked away, will provide hours of happy memories and even lead to some life story work. If Maureen was in a Care Home now I would say ‘she ..read more

I’m picking up Maureen from Ashgrove Care Home in a couple of hours.  I’m hoping that lots of TLC along with the right music will transform her from the little old lady who was asleep in a chair when I popped in to see her last night.  I’m encouraged by the fact that once she warmed up – with the help of a blanket – that the old Maureen was still there: she even invited me to get under the blanket with her ..read more

Kadampa Life This video moved me, and has helped me generate positive minds all day. So I thought I’d share some of my thoughts on it and invite you to contribute your own in the comments. The sentience — the sheer life — of animals. Indeed, how they are just like us, wanting to protect themselves and their young. They want to be happy and they don’t want to be hurt. Person, self, being, and I are synonyms according to Buddha. Animals are people. They are he’s and she’s, never its. Animals possess the same Buddha seeds of compassion and wisdom as we do — they are future Buddhas deserving o ..read more

The Waking Times recently published an article, available <HERE>, outlining the risks associated with taking antidepressants, antipsychotics, and benzodiazepines.  The infographics make sobering reading.  Once again I count my blessings that we live in North East Lincolnshire where we staff within NAViGO always weigh up the risks associated with prescribing medication and listen to patients.  Maureen and I were delighted when after three weeks assessment in the Konar Suite that the Consultant decided that medication was not needed at this moment in time! &n ..read more

Several people have questioned why I keep a close check on how Maureen is doing when she is in a Care Home.  I suppose it all started a couple of years ago when I went to visit her in Ladysmith Road Care Home and found her bruised and battered – as you will see in the picture below.  Once again I have erased her eyes to preserve her anonymity. The Care Home said she fell out of bed: sustaining severe bruising to her face and head.  They chose not to send her to the hospital or inform me of the incident, which I found bemusing.  Unfortunately, this has n ..read more

The news from Ashgrove Care Home yesterday was that Maureen is settling in.  Apparently, she’s teamed up with an old friend from a previous visit and they were walking around hand in hand. We seem to have escaped the worst of the Beat from the East at the moment with moderate snowfall.  However, conditions underfoot are treacherous and I’m not going out unless it is essential as I can’t risk a fall.  Maureen may well be in the best place during this cold snap rather than being stuck with someone who may be experiencing a touch of Cabin Fever ..read more

I took a  proverbial hammering on Monday night’/ Tuesday morning as I struggled to cope with Maureen’s presentation.  She didn’t know who I was or why I was locking her in a strange house against her will.  I hadn’t seen Maureen in this mode for some time and it took a long time before any of my attempts to calm her down had any impact. Eventually, music led to a temporary break in hostilities.  I chose my moment and called up ‘You Are My Sunshine‘ on YouTube.  Maureen broke into song as she remembered sitting on her dad’s knee as he sang to h ..read more