Gentle Parenting is hard, doesn’t work, and makes parents feel bad!
Sarah Ockwell-Smith | Gentle and Attachment Parenting
by SarahOckwell-Smith
1M ago
“Gentle parenting is so hard, I’m not sure I’m cut out for it!” If I had a pound/dollar/euro for everytime I’ve seen this written online I would be a VERY rich woman by now. However it is totally and uttlerly WRONG. This sentence makes me incredibly sad and frustrated because it highlights how much people don’t understand what Gentle parenting is. In all of my work, I talk about long term goals versus short term goals. Quick fixes that change behaviour today, versus focusing on who your child will be as a teen/adult. Gentle Parenting is very much focused on the latter. It is not about creatin ..read more
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No, it’s not their hormones! The real reason parents struggle with teen behaviour (and what to do about it).
Sarah Ockwell-Smith | Gentle and Attachment Parenting
by SarahOckwell-Smith
1M ago
“It’s their hormones!” If you raise a concern about your young person in a group of other parents, I can guarantee that within a minute talk will turn to hormones. If your young person is male, any difficulties you have will be blamed on the fact that their body is “swimming in testosterone”; if they are female, then their behaviour will be put down to “oodles of oestrogen”. Apparently, testosterone makes boys aggressive, rude and ‘boisterous’, whereas oestrogen makes girls sulky, erratic and rude, especially when it’s ‘the time of the month’. What if I told you that this isn’t true? In fact ..read more
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The last Christmas toy – why the festive season hits different when you have teenagers
Sarah Ockwell-Smith | Gentle and Attachment Parenting
by SarahOckwell-Smith
3M ago
The following is a short excerpt from my new book ‘How to Raise a Teen‘: Photo by Any Lane on Pexels.com Have you ever thought about the last time you did something with your young person (YP)? When they are little, we commemorate their firsts; first steps, first words, first solid food, their first pair of shoes and the first time they slept through the night. We take photos to stick in photo albums and share their pictures proudly on our social media. We call family and friends and let them know how exciting their new achievements are. Their lasts however either pass us by unconsciously, or ..read more
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Ten important takeaways from ‘Because I Said So! why society is Childist and how breaking the cycle of discrimination towards children can change the world’
Sarah Ockwell-Smith | Gentle and Attachment Parenting
by SarahOckwell-Smith
6M ago
Ten important takeaways from ‘Because I Said So! why society is Childist and how breaking the cycle of discrimination towards children can change the world’: 1. Childism is discrimination based on age. The correct term should actually be ‘ageism’, which is a well accepted ‘ism already – but universally used to talk about the discrimination of the elderly. 2. We have all been affected by childism when we were children, we often don’t realise it though and just grew to accept that adults hold a position of power over children. Often our loved ones have been even more deeply affected than us and ..read more
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Win a copy of my new book!
Sarah Ockwell-Smith | Gentle and Attachment Parenting
by SarahOckwell-Smith
6M ago
You're currently a free subscriber. Upgrade your subscription to get access to the rest of this post and other paid-subscriber only content. Upgrade subscription ..read more
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Why I’m Fighting Childism and Championing Gentle Parenting – my story
Sarah Ockwell-Smith | Gentle and Attachment Parenting
by SarahOckwell-Smith
7M ago
When I had my first child, in 2002, I struggled to follow the mainstream parenting advice of the time, particularly when it came to sleep. My son was easily the worst sleeper of all the babies I came across in the baby groups we attended. The other parents were able to put their babies down awake in their cots in their blacked-out nurseries, give them a quick kiss on the cheek, then walk out and close the door. Their babies were capable of the miraculous skill of ‘self-soothing’, while mine would cling to me desperately. He wailed when I put him down, his arms reaching up for me, big brown, te ..read more
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Why ‘the youth of today’ are actually better behaved than ever (despite their harsh parenting)
Sarah Ockwell-Smith | Gentle and Attachment Parenting
by SarahOckwell-Smith
7M ago
“That’s the problem with the youth of today – no discipline, parents who mollycoddle them, wrap them up in cotton wool and let the little darlings get away with everything.” “The youth of today have no respect, they run riot, out of control. Their parents are to blame of course.” Photo by Cori Emmalea Rodriguez on Pexels.com Go to any social media discussion about today’s generation of children and you will find a comment similar to the above. These statements are wrong for so many reasons. They are spoken through rose-tinted spectacles forgetting the past and misinterpreting the present. Inco ..read more
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Why we need more politicians who are mothers
Sarah Ockwell-Smith | Gentle and Attachment Parenting
by SarahOckwell-Smith
8M ago
In the UK, only a third of parliament are female. The male/female ratio of politicians has been shifting slowly in the right direction – two decades ago women made up only twenty percent of parliament, but a fair balance still remains someway in the future. Photo by Antonio Jamal Roberson on Pexels.com There is ample evidence to support the idea that women make better leaders, especially when it comes to issues providing direct help to constituents, championing gender equality, improving childcare provision, working across party-lines, calling for electoral reform and improving care for the el ..read more
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The problem with end-of-term school attendance and behaviour awards
Sarah Ockwell-Smith | Gentle and Attachment Parenting
by SarahOckwell-Smith
8M ago
Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com As I write, it is the end of the school year in England. Last week, hundreds of schools celebrated the most priviledged of their students. Those priviledged include children who are fortunate enough to have good health, a two-parent family or a single-parent family with lots of local support, a family lucky enough to not live in poverty, a parent with good physical and mental health and children with special educational needs and disabilities. Children lucky enough to tick all of these boxes were treated with special parties, ice creams, certificates, sticker ..read more
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‘Because I Said So!’ – free book excerpt and introduction to Childism
Sarah Ockwell-Smith | Gentle and Attachment Parenting
by SarahOckwell-Smith
10M ago
Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com ‘Because I said so!’ How many times did you hear this phrase from your parents or carers when you were a child, having dared to question the wisdom of adult authority? I’d wager quite a lot. Maybe you were frequently ordered to ‘just do as you’re told!’? Or perhaps you remember hearing a countdown in stern tones: ‘three . . . two . . . one’? Many of us will recall being scared into submission before the countdown was complete; others will remember being on the receiving end of a swift slap across the backs of our legs, or being dragged to sit in another room ..read more
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